Mely’s Bar y Restaurante

Mely’s Bar y Restaurante

- in Food, Life

Location: Calle Calzada. De la Catedral 1 1/2 c. al lago

Today we had lunch at Mely’s Bar y Restaurante. It’s amazing we’ve never eaten here before since it’s on La Calzada and we pass by it several times per week. I’m not sure if this implies that their street-side marketing sucks, or if we are incredibly un-observant people, but either way I will certainly be eating there again.

I don’t think Roberta will, though. Her order was not at all what she THOUGHT she ordered…but this happened often even in The States. You see, Roberta is a complicated orderer. She can’t simply point at something on a menu and say, “I want that!” No, she has to add all sorts of intricate requests and caveats so that when she’s done, what she’s ordered doesn’t actually exist on the menu. I’ve routinely heard her order a pepperoni pizza on whole wheat bread with mustard and, instead of pepperoni, thinly sliced deli turkey and pickles. I can’t imagine how many times a chef at a restaurant we’ve visited simply ordered out to a different restaurant to get something close to what Roberta requested.

But I digress. I was VERY pleased with our meal. We started off with the chicken nachos. These were pollo-tastic. Char-broiled dark meat chicken dumped atop a huge heap of corn chips, cheese, and pico de gallo. Roberta had ordered these chicken nachos WITHOUT chicken (of course!) but luckily the waiter had not understood, so we got the chicken.

I ordered the chicken tacos, and man were they good! They were huge, packed with grilled white and dark meat and came with a side of creamy re-fried beans and sour cream. Levi had the chicken quesadillas. I didn’t try them, but he enjoyed them.

Chicken Tacos!
Chicken Quesadillas!

I’m not sure what Roberta ended up with. She ordered the chicken fajitas with several oddball requests and asked several oddball questions in a language she can’t speak during the ordering process, so what she received looked to be some sort of chicken curry thing and not chicken fajitas. She was not happy about it.

We had a dog stare at us the entire meal. This is not uncommon. Granada is rife with stray dogs. They are all very well mannered and nice, though. They live off the kindness of strangers and are smart enough to realize this, meaning they are not aggressive, but quite docile and humble, just hoping to get a few scraps when they can.

Stray Dog!

Believe it or not, we actually ended up at Mely’s again tonight WHILE I WAS WRITING THIS POST. Roberta was just about to make dinner at the house while I was writing this post when our propane tank went out, so we had to venture out for dinner. Levi wanted a hamburger, and I recalled seeing a few options on the Mely’s menu from our earlier visit, so we ended up here.

Added bonus: the waiter from our earlier visit was still here this evening and he returned two of Levi’s crayons that I guess we had left before. They had probably fallen off the table, unnoticed to us. Now THAT’S service!

The waiter just brought Levi’s hamburger. Yes, I’m now writing this in REAL TIME! This burger looks pretty goddamn good. I ordered nothing but a Victoria Frost, but am now regretting it, because this burger looks savory.

Roberta just took Levi to wash his hands! I’m tempted to eat this burger quickly before he returns and blame its disappearance on a stray dog.

ME: Levi, I’m sorry, but a stray dog leapt up on the table and ate your hamburger. And fries. And ketchup packets.

LEVI: Why are you licking your fingers? And why do you have an empty ketchup packet stuck between your teeth?

At this point I would simply run off into the night, my belly full of ground beef; my teeth full of drained ketchup packets.

Our total bill for chicken nachos, chicken quesadillas, chicken tacos, one Coca-Cola, one Diet Coke, and one bottled water was C$610, or about $24 USD.

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Mely's Bar y Restaurante
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About the author

I lived in Granada, Nicaragua for a while with my wife and kid. Now I don't. But we like to get back there whenever we can, unless we go somewhere else.

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